“Some people really stepped up.” That’s what a friend of mine said when I asked him how things went when he returned to work after a month of medical leave. The look on his face and the tone of his voice said the rest, “. . . and some people didn’t.” It is a common theme of discussion in my executive leadership coaching practice. I hear it from most leaders I talk with. Some people step up, and some people do not. It is often surprising who does and who doesn’t. We are thrilled by the unexpected leadership shown by those who rise to the occasion, and we can be so disappointed by people who fail to meet our expectations. The former can be gratifying, but the latter can shake our confidence as leaders.
“It’s not supposed to be fun. That’s why they call it work.” That was my father’s attempt at humor whenever I complained about chores around the house. I know he was only kidding, but for many people, this is how they truly feel. It’s work, so it is supposed to be hard and unpleasant. The idea that work could be fun is almost counter-cultural. Several years ago, in spite of what my father said, I came to the realization that work not only can be fun, it should be. That doesn’t mean that we will always love every aspect of our work, but I believe we are doing ourselves a real disservice if we don’t strive to find employment that is fulfilling and enjoyable. This new way of looking at work was a primary driver behind my decision to leave the relative security of my corporate life for the uncertainty of entrepreneurship.
As a leadership coach, speaker and writer, I am always looking for examples of leadership to share, and I often find them in the places you would expect – business, politics, current events, sports. But I recently had the pleasure of finding leadership in an unusual spot, my son’s Rock Star Camp. Local songwriter and musician Dean Fields supplements his income with guitar lessons. During the summers, he takes these lessons a step further in the form of Rock Star Camps. Last week, my son finished one of these camps, and I was struck by the extraordinary leadership it takes for Dean to make these happen.Here is how it works:
Today marks the 265th anniversary of John Paul Jones’s birth. This extraordinary leader was the father of the American Navy, and his willingness to lead courageously earned him his place in history. His immortal words, “I have not yet begun to fight” spurred his officers and sailors to victory against a far superior force in the battle of Flamborough Head during the American Revolution. These same words have inspired naval officers throughout history to lead courageously. As the son of one of these officers, I felt compelled to illustrate the attribute of courage in my book, If You Will Lead, using Jones as the paradigm.
I spend much of my time speaking and writing about the role that choice plays in our ability to reach our leadership potential. I often tell my clients that true leadership starts with choosing to become a leader. As with all rules, there are always exceptions. There will always be leadership roles that are thrust upon us. For me, that was the case with fatherhood. When my wife and I chose to become parents, we considered many things, but we never thought about the leadership implications. During the past fifteen and a half years, I have learned that being a father is the most important leadership role I will ever play. Even though I didn’t choose to lead when I chose to become a father, I have chosen how to grow into this vital role, and I hope fathers everywhere will do the same.