We often hear leaders described as having character. What exactly do we mean by character, and why does it matter? The fact is that character can be extremely discomforting to discuss. The challenge is that character is rooted in very personal (and often polarizing) subjects – values and beliefs. It is easy to come across as either self-righteous or irresolute. That said, character is an essential to leadership attribute.
In the second couplet of Rudyard Kipling’s classic poem, ‘If-’ he challenges his readers to act with character. He wrote:
To “trust yourself when all men doubt you” takes a great deal of courage and self-confidence. Most of all it takes character. Webster’s defines character as “a composite of good moral qualities typically of moral excellence and firmness blended with resolution.” British writer and politician Thomas Babington Macaulay described it more succinctly. He said, “The measure of a man’s character is what he would do if he knew he never would be found out.” Another great description of character comes from the United States Air Force Academy Code of Conduct. It states, “We define character as the sum of those qualities of moral excellence that stimulates a person to do the right thing, which is manifested through right and proper actions despite internal or external pressures to the contrary.” What greater pressure is there than the doubts of others?
How we conduct ourselves defines our character. Our actions demonstrate to the world what really matters to us. What we say we value is often less important than what our actions reveal. When we describe a leader as having strong character, we are acknowledging that her actions reflect her values and beliefs. Conversely, a leader demonstrates weak character when she says one thing and does another, or she acts in ways that don’t convey a consistent message about who she is.
Strong character comes from knowing and trusting oneself. It is an essential attribute for earning and maintaining the trust of those we lead. Character guides us to do what we know is right. The more we demonstrate the strength of our character – by ensuring that our words and deeds are consistent with our beliefs and values – the stronger that trust grows. Character is not moral superiority or sanctimony. It’s about doing what we believe is right regardless of the opinion of others.
Character also means having the confidence to accept the doubts of others. It means being open and curious to understand fully what is causing their reservations. When Kipling wrote, “make allowance for their doubting too,” he was advising his readers to seek to understand the source of others’ “doubting.” When colleagues express misgivings about our actions or decisions, they are giving us the opportunity for self-examination.
It is important to remember that doubt is neither good nor bad. In some cases, doubt may simply reveal that that we are challenging the status quo. In other cases, it may reveal that we are doing something contrary to our core beliefs. Doubt sometimes exposes conflict between two or more core beliefs or values. This is not uncommon. For example, a leader may believe strongly in maintaining an open and honest work environment, yet he may be legally constrained about what information he can share with employees. His values are in conflict, and he must choose what is most important.
Strong character requires emotional maturity. “Making allowance” for the doubts of others doesn’t mean we simply acquiesce to their way of thinking. Rather, it allows us to use their misgivings as a catalyst for increased awareness and choice. If we find that our actions are consistent with our beliefs and values, we can proceed with renewed confidence. If on the other hand, our self-examination reveals that our actions violate our beliefs or values, we can alter our actions. Changing our position can be one of the greatest tests of our character.
Leading with character goes beyond simply having character. Our ability to lead is in large part based on our ability to instill trust in others. Those we lead want and need to trust us. And to trust us, they must know us. That means allowing them to get close. It means sharing and exposing our beliefs and values. Leading with character requires that we make ourselves vulnerable. We are in essence giving others insight into our souls. This can very uncomfortable, especially for those who have not fully explored their beliefs.
In an earlier blog post (The “If 16” Leadership Framework, 1/6/2001), I wrote about the importance of knowing who we are and what we believe. Unfortunately, the process of fully knowing oneself is difficult, if not impossible. Even the most self-aware are unable to articulate a complete inventory of their beliefs. It is an ongoing process of self-discovery. Like leadership, our character will mature and evolve as we grow and learn.
Everyone faces doubt. Self-doubt is among the most common and destructive. We regularly take on responsibilities for which we are ill prepared, and these situations can cause uncertainty and self-doubt. Character, our moral fiber, enables us to trust ourselves even in the face of self-doubt.
Of course, those we lead will also face self-doubt. As leaders, we must help thoem to trust themselves. When we challenge others to step up to a new opportunity, they will likely make mistakes as they learn. Their failures have the potential to erode confidence and create self-doubt. Effective leaders recognize this risk and take steps to restore confidence and trust after a failure.
How do we build and demonstrate a strong character? Here are five steps that one can take to begin the process.
- Decide that character matters. The simple act of making character important will raise your awareness of whether your actions are in synch with your beliefs.
- Take time to inventory and examine your beliefs and values. Your beliefs and values are your character’s foundation. The process of fully understanding them is unending, so get started now!
- Share your beliefs and values. Leading with character means being open and explicit about what truly matters. This means talking about your personal beliefs, your organization’s beliefs and what they mean to you.
- Test your actions and decisions. Critical self-examination will help us maintain alignment between our actions and our beliefs and values.
- Have the character to act on your self-examination. It takes character to stay the course when “all men doubt you.” It also takes character to change your position. Leadership demands that we be able to do both as the situation dictates.
Leaders trust themselves. They also encourage others to trust. Being a leader invariably means others will doubt us. We may even share their doubt. Success in the face of doubt depends on our ability to remain true to our principles and beliefs. Failures will occur, and we will make mistakes. Character is not about perfection. It is about striving to seek the wisdom to know what is right and having the conviction to do it regardless of the opinion of others.
